Funny Beware of Dog Signs

Beware of Dog signs have been around since the days of Ancient Rome (cave canem!). They endure today as tools to discourage intruders, limit liability, or just to save an unwitting visitor from a painful ass-biting.

Oh, and they can also be hilarious. To prove it, check out these funny Beware of Dog signs that manage to get their point across with a little levity.

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The Cat is Not Trustworthy Either

Sign: Beware of the Dog - the Cat is not Trustworthy Either
Available at Amazon.com

Wherever you fall in the cat-vs-dog debate, you have to admit that felines are better at getting away with stuff. That’s why this sign is not only funny, but insightful. It would be even more insightful if it said the cat was less trustworthy.

I Can Make it to the Fence in 2.8 Seconds

Sign: I can make it to the fence in 2.8 seconds - can you?
Available at Amazon.com

This sign is no joke. But the way it gets its menacing message across is clever – perhaps clever enough to grab the attention of a would-be trespasser. Outrunning guard dogs is not something that happens very often outside of TV and movies. Think of this as a reality check.

Area Patrolled By Chihuahua Security Company

Yard Sign: Area Patrolled By Chihuahua Security Company
Available at Amazon.com

You can pick up one of these signs for a lot of different popular breeds. However, they’re most funny when the dog is a small breed like a Yorkie, Maltese, or the pictured Chihuahua. Maybe not the best sign for keeping the ne’re-do-wells away, but it definitely entertains.

Dog Can’t Hold Licker (Doormat)

Doormat: Beware - Dog can't hold its licker
Available at Amazon.com

Does your dog give people a complementary tongue bath when they come to your house? If so, you might want to warn visitors with this humorous door mat.

I Have Issues

Sign: Warning - I Have Issues
Available at Amazon.com

There’s nothing not to like about this sign (well, aside from the fact that it reinforces stereotypes about Pit Bulls). It serves a dire warning while managing to be funny – and does so in the same number of words as the classic “Beware of Dog” message.

Guess Which Days

Sign: This area is protected by a very nasty guard dog 3 days a week. Guess which days?
Available at Amazon.com

Wouldn’t it be more effective to claim that the guard dog is on duty seven days a week? Maybe not. First of all, this plants doubt in the heads of repeat trespassers (just because you got away with it once doesn’t mean you will again). Secondly, the sign exploits the fact that humans fear uncertainty. As a bonus, the sign has a heck of a lot of style.

Beware of Owner

This sign speaks the truth – humans are far more dangerous than dogs. You can get one of these signs for the breed of your choice, but once again, it’s funniest when the dog is a small breed.

Beware of the Bitch

Sign: Beware of the bitch and keep one eye on the dog
Available at Amazon.com

This is basically another version of the “Beware of Owner” sign, but with more awesomeness added. It would make a fantastic gift… for the right person, of course.